Wednesday, March 16, 2011

"Who am I?" - Broken and Beautiful


Welcome back for our Wednesday's "Who am I?" study! This weeks title was not on my list months ago when God put this series on my heart, but He has me (a tired, expecting Mom with 4 little ones) up in the wee hours to write it! Anyway, I pray He will speak to you on this topic in the same powerful way He has done with me! So on to our topic...

"Who am I?" "Broken!" Yes, that answer makes sense! I've had a broken heart, broken dreams, broken relationships... You get the idea; I have been broken. Simply said, I've felt no good, incomplete, not good enough; sometimes these feelings resulted because of what was done to me and others because of things I'd done myself. The answer, broken, comes as no surprise.

But it's the last word in the title of this post that is hard to type (and more so harder to believe) as an answer to our question. "Who am I?" "Beautiful." The response I've mentally given to that statement for years (35 of them to be exact) is "yeah right, look at me!!"

Honestly I've been able to give some positive answers to our question, but beautiful has never been one of them. Actually, my response in this area has been quite the opposite or an issue I avoided entirely. So much so that as a kid growing up, I'd fight my sisters for the backseat behind the passenger simply because I didn't want to look up and see myself in the rear view mirror.

I'm sure you'd agree, I had issues with my looks. But honestly this isn't a past tense struggle, I still do. God showed me the importance of dealing with this over a year ago, when my then almost 5 year old little girl sincerely said to me, "I'm not pretty." Like every Mom, I know my child is the cutest, but still her words hurt.

Especially the ones that followed my "yes you are" response; without a beat, my little Joy said, "you're just saying that." Honestly my heart broke because I knew how she felt, in my mind I'd probably said the same thing to my husband that very day. God directed me to speak His truth to her and as I did, He challenged me to believe it for myself!

And now, for the first time ever, I will say it: I am beautiful. It's hard for me to believe I just typed those words, but I'm finally at a place where it's harder not to believe God's Word.

Please read it for yourself -

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7 NIV

"Let the king be enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord." (Psalm 45:11 NIV)

How do those verses affect your thinking? Friend don't do what I've always done, go back and don't just read them, but claim this as truth. He sees your heart; it doesn't matter that you were mistaken as a boy on the junior high basketball team or what size your pants are - in His eyes, you are beautiful!!!

Today will you take the time to share that truth with someone (perhaps like me and share it with yourself in writing), not because you think highly of yourself (remember we are broken!!), but because you think highly of HIM!! It's time we start seeing ourselves the way God does and then honoring Him with who we are!!

Dear Heavenly Father,
May we always ask, "Who am I?" and more importantly may we always remember to seek Your answer to the question. Make us the women you created us to be. Though we are broken, let us not forget we are beautiful. Lord, we love you and we thank you, now let us go and honor you. In the precious name of Jesus, I pray. Amen

3 comments:

  1. Great post, Jill! Something I need to hear...often. Thanks for being so open and honest.

    I thought of these verses, "Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God." I Peter 3:3-4

    Oh to be beautiful within....which is so precious to God! He looks at the heart. :) Thank you, Lord!

    Love you, beautiful friend!!

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  2. Oh, sweet Jill. HOW I struggle with the area of my looks and feeling not so beautiful. And, indeed, I was also mistaken for a boy in junior high school.

    He is continually working with me on this one...not finding my worth (or rather my LACK of worth) by comparing myself with those I or the world deem beautiful. I am having to learn that He DOES find me beautiful, that HE created me this way and was well pleased with how He knit me together. AND, as Rachel said, I am continually learning that truly an inner beauty, one that reflects the Lord is so much more important than say having...ummmmmmm...womanly assets...ummmmm...up top. ;) Just bein' real on that last statement. :)

    Love you, beautiful friend,
    K

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  3. Say it, sister! I can so relate to your post. I'm praying over those verses. I know God wants me to claim them, too. Thanks for the encouragement.
    Laura

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