Just over a month ago, I shared a post with the same title! (You can read it HERE.) That post led to comments about a book with the same title, Seriously God? by Jenny Smith. Which has now led to the this post, one that will close with your opportunity to win a copy of Jen's book for yourself.
Early in August, Jen contacted me and offered to give me a copy of her book since I'd asked the same question and she graciously offered a copy for me to give-away as well. I told her I'd do it towards the end of the month...so here we are!
"Seriously God?" is a thought that runs through my mind quite often...sometimes it is accompanied with excitement, others anxiety, but today I want to share a time when those words were spoken with tears.
Four years ago today, I found myself in a Dr.'s office so he could confirm what I already knew - we were losing our fourth child. I was having a miscarriage. I would never hold the child I'd already come to love.
There were tears, lots of tears. There was pain - physical, emotional and spiritual as well. And anger and things I didn't understand.
Still, I think I can replay a conversation, "Seriously God, you create me to love the life that's growing in me, only to take it away? Seriously God, why? Why does it hurt so much? Seriously God, this is the plan you have for me? Seriously God, you expect me to walk thru this hurt when so many don't understand?"
There were lots of bad things, feelings and emotions, but there was also peace, comfort and strength.
"Seriously God, she just shows up with a meal? Seriously God, heaven is for real and my baby is there!! Seriously God, I'm the one with the loss, but you've comforted me so I can comfort others."
Now four years later, I find myself thinking those same two words, "Seriously God." That can be a question, but you know it's also quite the statement!
Friend, I'm serious when I say God has brought me to a place where I can face the anniversary of one of the hardest times of my life and say, "God had a purpose for it all." Exactly all that purpose entails? I don't know, but He has given me bits and pieces. And honestly, I trust Him with the rest.
That's not saying I won't grieve the little one we lost, but I will thank Him for the 5 kiddos I will squeeze a little tighter today!
So friend, how about you, have you ever asked the same question? Share about it in the comments...I love to hear your stories and it enters you to win a copy of Seriously God? - I'm Doing Everything I Know to Do and It's Not Working. Remember be sure to leave your email address so I can contact you if you win!! Check back on Tuesday when the winner will be announced!
I'm praying you are blessed in whatever SERIOUSLY GOD? situation arises in your life today!!
4 comments:
Seriously....God is using you! :) Thank you for sharing your story, your vulnerability, and your heart with us. I'm in the "Seriously God?" phase right now as I embark on my God-sized dream...most recently, I was asked to be a contributor for a grief and hardships devotional bible being published by Zondervan. I'm still saying, "Seriously God?" and simply walking in obedience. Love that His dreams for me are so much better than my own.
Teske
Seriously God? is a question I've also asked many times, and when in sorrow and confusion, it is usually phrased as Why God? Through 5 miscarriages and learning to embrace God's plan to bless us with a child with disabilities. Through struggling with releasing our firstborn as he heads to college and questioning other aspects of a typical chaotic life. God's answer has always been one of love. And in awe, I have whispered Seriously God? as His grace has been ministered in surprising ways.
This sounds like a wonderful book, one which will bless many.
"Seriously God?" I think it has been used in so many ways in my own life, as well. Seriously God, you want to use ME? (One that still blows my mind so often...that He would let me be an instrument in His amazing plans) Seriously God, you want me to go back to work right when it looks like I am finally going to have time to write? (Only to find out He had SO much purpose tucked into me going back to work and it was for sure just the right thing to do.)
I am so thankful we can trust Him. Even in the most painful of "Seriously, God?" moments. You share your heart beautifully here and are such a light.
Love you!
K
I'm not sure I have ever said that in the major crises inmy life; it's more on a daily basis, like "seriously God? WHY did you think blessing me with THIS child was a good idea? How can I handle her?" kind of questions.
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