Thirteen years ago, I was a second year teacher living my dream...well, that's what it looked like on the outside. I was doing what I set out to do, but I was lonely, empty and depressed. At times it felt my purpose in life was to survive the day, only to wake up and do it again.
That strategy worked until I got to the place where I didn't want to do it again...13 years ago this month, I contemplated ending it all. I had a plan, but thankfully God had a different one.
Had my plan unfolded, I would be in a place of darkness F-O-R-E-V-E-R. You see prior to that Tuesday night in September I was a church go-er, I'd been baptized and I thought I was good enough to get to heaven.
But God, He knew. He knew I was a lost soul in need of a Savior. I was a religious girl who longed for a relationship. He didn't just know about my life, He worked in it. In ways that are too many for this post, but that have brought me to this place. This place of reflecting on "Seriously God?" moments of my life.
"Seriously God, I'm not good enough to get to heaven?" Now that question makes me shake my head, but there was a time when the reality of those words hit. HARD.
Growing up I was the good girl. Granted I made mistakes and wasn't perfect, but certainly my good outweighed the bad. I honestly thought I'd work my way to heaven.
That was until life (God) brought me to my knees, removed the scales from my eyes and helped me see the truth.
“There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands; there is no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one." Romans 3:10-12
For awhile that scared me..."Seriously God, I mean if I'm not good enough, how can I assure myself I won't spend eternity in hell?"
It was then He brought Ephesians 2:8-9 to me; here Paul says, "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast."
God answered my question and invited me to accept the gift He has given. And friend today if these words have left you uttering the same ones, the ones that say, "Seriously God, I'm not good enough to get to heaven?" He wants to say the same to you...He is offering you the free gift of salvation as well!!
How do you receive it you may wonder - again, Paul has the answer, "If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved." (Romans 10:9)
This seriously God question is a critical one...I pray you will answer it today!! It will change your life forever and save it for eternity!! If you have any questions, concerns or prayer requests leave a comment or send me an email - jillberan@yahoo.com. If you have a friend who believes what I once did, I encourage you to visit with them today!!
Praying for you in your "Seriously God?" moments!! Would love your prayers as I journey through mine as well!!
3 comments:
Wow, Jill, what a momentous occasion! I celebrate with you that God intervened, and LOOK AT YOU now! All because of a simple question. Praise GOD you found the Truth. When I look at the faces of all your precious babies, I'm astonished at God's grace and His goodness.
How far you've come, my friend!
((Hugs))
I'm praising Him as well!! Whenever I reflect I'm amazed at how HE works!! He is good!!
Hugs to you too!!
So thankful for how much He loves us. For how He pursues us. For His good and perfect plans. And so very, very thankful He intervened so powerfully in your life!
MUCH love to you!
K :)
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