What do you do with a loss?

March Madness is upon us, which is great for basketball fans of all ages. It can be exciting and fun, but when the losses come it is difficult. Last night my favorite team, the Iowa State Cyclones, took an early exit from the tourney. It's easy to question the coach, fault the players and blame the refs, but my thoughts went deeper today.

First, it is a game. There are worse things than a loss in an athletic contest. This is not a matter of life and death. The sun came up today and most likely the Cyclones will be playing ball again next season.

Second, this hurts the players and coaches more than it impacts any fan. Sure your bracket may be busted, but their season is over. They have poured blood, sweat and tears into this. They set goals and dreamed dreams and now it's all come to a close. I never played in the NCAAs, but I've played in some year ending defeats and coached in them too. Regardless of the stage, it's not a moment you enjoy.

Finally, the focus of this post. As I thought about our team's loss, I thought about the lesson it gives for life. Chances are you're not sitting in the losing team's locker room, but you may have experienced a loss in life. This won't show up on the scoreboard or in the local paper, but life can leave you defeated. So friend, my question is: What do we do with a loss?

The coach in me will provide the most important answer - learn from it. When we experience a loss, be it on the court, in a relationship or at our job, we often want to move on and forget about it, but that should not be our go to response. Take a look at your situation. Ask yourself some questions. Why did you fail? What could have you done differently? How can you improve?

As I thought about this 3 areas came to mind. If you've recently experienced a big loss or feel like you're in the midst of a losing streak would you think about this?

Check your heart. If we want to experience success, our heart has to be in it. We need to be devoted and engaged. If I want to win as a wife or a mom, I must be present. Not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually and mentally. If I have dreams of success as a woman in ministry or at my place of work, I need my heart and plans to be aligned with God's. On the basketball court it doesn't take long to recognize someone who's heart just in it and the same can be said for the game of life. If your heart is the issue, use Psalm 51:10 to guide your prayers - "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me." 

Check your effort. Effort is basically another word for work. This is a necessity on the basketball court. It's easy to tell when this is lacking and it almost always leads to a loss. I'm sure the Cyclones are reliving the game in their minds. It's not that they played lackadaisical, but each one can probably point out one individual mistake that played a part in the loss. In the game of hoops every possession matters; in the game of life every word and every action makes a difference. Oh to be mindful of that always. Friend, today instead of just reading this verse, I pray we make it our mission. Colossians 3:17 says, "And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him."

Check your focus. I have no idea how many times I told my elementary girls to focus this year, but it was a key word for our season. I've heard Coach Prohm often talk about staying the course. Often in a loss we can look back and see a lapse in thinking that led to a mistake. Sometimes when we watch a game, we see a player whose focus is on himself rather than the team. This often leads to a loss. Friend, as you strive for victory in this life, what is your focus? Is it on you or Jesus? Hebrews 12:2 instructs us to "fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith." Are you striving towards your goals or working to live out God's commands? Psalm 119:112 says, "My heart is set on keeping your decrees to the very end."

Finally, a loss isn't always a bad thing. It can be a motivator. It can lead to improvement, which results in more success. So friend, no matter what loss you walk through, know this - it is hard. There will be pain, maybe even tears, but if we respond rightly it can play a part in victory. I hope and pray the Cyclones reflect on the game and remember the pain as they work towards next year.

We never set out to lose, but like my grandma always told me defeat is part of playing the game.  I'm asking God to help us recognize the losses in our life, so that we can learn from them and experience more success because of them. Friend, win or lose may we make living out Psalm 34:3 our goal!

Oh, magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt his name together!