This past week I've been thinking about a lot of different things, but one in particular is writing. Before Christmas I found myself writing quite regularly and in October I had committed to posting on my blog everyday, but this month is about over and just now I'm posting for the second time.
I could come up with quite a few reasons as to why I don't write...I'm busy, other things are more important, there's not enough time, and the list goes on. Just yesterday I realized these really aren't reasons, they are excuses and the real reason I don't write is because sometimes I am afraid.
You see my last post, the little pep talk for my former basketball team is one God's reminded me of quite often since the words left my fingers. And that's been the case with many of my other posts. I've realized this before, but this past week it seems I've been more aware of this fear.
I believe God has some things on my heart, but deep down I'm afraid of putting it out there. Not because it's bad or wrong, but because I know from past experience He calls me to live out the messages I type up! Believe me, I know He's God and He's going to do what He wants rather I write or not, but for me putting things on paper really is a form of accountability. Talking with my hands (literally) is much easier than with my mouth, so I don't hear, "Practice what you preach" too often, but I know I could hear, "Practice what you post!"
As I think about what it seems God is calling me to share, I recall hearing Lysa TerKeurst say, "If you write about parenting, bank on your child going to the principal; if you write about marriage, be prepared for yours to be attacked..." I'm not one much for battles or confrontation, so those words scare me and support my reason for not writing.
I also know God's Word tells us, "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Phil. 3:12-14
If I were to guess I'm sure there were times Paul didn't want to do what he was called to do, but yet he persevered. That perseverance usually didn't bring great earthly rewards, but his faith grew and his light was shining.
Friend I don't know what God is calling you to do and I don't know the reasons you're not doing it, but would you join me in taking some time to think about this. I know one of my answers to the title of this post was "it doesn't matter anyway" and perhaps you think the same, but can I share this thought with you - what YOU do always matters to at least one person (and for a side note since we are part of the body, what we do always impacts others), so even if no one else is affected by your actions, you are!
When we are obedient, God will bless and strengthen our relationship with Him and that my friend is why we should do what He asks us to do!! Even when we are afraid...perhaps especially when we are afraid!!
Feel free to share...I would be honored to lift you in prayer!