Sunday, November 15, 2009

What's in a name?

"Jeda-what? How did you come up with that name? How do you spell that??" All questions we've heard a number of times over the last month after naming our little guy Jedidiah Jay Beran. I'm sure the spelling one is a question he will hear for many years to come, but for now when his 4 year old sister asks, I simply respond, "J-E-D."

That speeds things up, but for now I'd like to share the story behind his name because I know it's not one you hear everyday. Our three older kids all have a family connection with their name - J.D. is James Daniel, with James being his dad and grandpa's name and Daniel his other grandpa. Joy's middle name is a combination of my middle name, Ann, and my mom's middle name, Lee, to get Leanne. While Jaylyn has her other grandma's name for her middle name, Marie. This time around we decided not to move to the next generation, but instead have a name that was on my heart during the pregnancy.

As some of you know, prior to this pregnancy we experienced a miscarriage and as I prepared to meet our little man, the baby we lost came to mind quite often. At times I would find myself feeling guilty - as I was excited about a new baby, it was hard to think about embracing a new child when thoughts would turn to the baby I never got to hold.

I believe it was last March when I was first explaining this to my husband. He grieved too, but things seemed different from a mom's perspective. As I shared my pain with him he encouraged me to look at David's response after he had lost a child. So in an attempt to find comfort that is what I did.
I found myself in 2 Samuel 12 and read the following words, "But when David saw them whispering, he realized what had happened. "Is the baby dead? he asked. "Yes," they replied. Then David got up from the ground, washed himself, put on lotions, and changed his clothes. Then he went to the Tabernacle and worshipped the LORD. After that he returned to the palace and ate. His advisers were amazed. "We don't understand you," they told him. "While the baby was still living, you wept and refused to eat. But now that the baby is dead, you have stopped your mourning and are eating again."

David replied, "I fasted and wept while the child was alive, for I said, 'Perhaps the LORD will be gracious to me and let the child live.' But why should I fast when he is dead? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him one day, but he cannot return to me."

Though it didn't take the pain away, David's words made sense. In the few short weeks I knew I was pregnant before the miscarriage I sensed something was wrong. I too had shed tears while our baby was living, but now it was true my child would not return to me. Like David though there was hope - someday I will go to her.

So with that I had some peace and found myself looking forward to the newest addition to our family. With that expectation came the joy of choosing a name and as I had numerous names go through my mind, God drew me back to this story in Samuel in July.

In verse 24, it goes on to say, "Then David comforted Bathsheba, his wife and slept with her. She became pregnant and gave birth to a son, and they named him Solomon. The LORD loved the child and sent word through Nathan the prophet that his name should be Jedidiah - "beloved of the LORD" - because the LORD loved him.

When God had me read these words again, I had just found out we were expecting a boy when prior to our ultrasound I had felt it was a girl. That experience brought back the pain and loss of our miscarriage, but God kept speaking to me. As I let go of a little girl's name He had put on my heart, He gave me the name of our new little man.

It's a name I didn't expect, actually one my husband considered 3 years earlier, but I had ruled out. I think he was surprised when I was the one to put it up for consideration this time! But as I read thru the notes in my Bible that go along with verse 24, I could relate - "Solomon was the 4th son of David and Bathsheba. But Bathsheba may still have been grieving over the first child's death."

That was me. And now I'm blessed to have my own little Jedidiah! Even though others will forever misspell his name, I know without a doubt it's the one God gave! And I pray he will always live up to the meaning of it and forever be a friend of God!!

1 comment:

  1. Jill, you hadn't told me this! But, it's very cool. :) The more I get to know Jedidiah, the more I like the name. Little Jed is definately a wonderful gift from the Lord...and beloved by Him!